I started this post the other day. Then went to Zumba and felt better. Ran Thursday and felt better. Ate like crap again yesterday (Friday) though. But ran this morning for the first time in the rain. And in what i consider "short" running shorts. As a religious person, I kept going back to this image of baptism. Rebirth. Remember not being able to run up that back hill? Remember alternating walking and running? All that has changed. As I started out in a drizzle and my shorts began to ride up in between my still chubby thighs, I instantly started swearing out my husband for insisting that I wear them today. Didn't he get it? I'm still fat. I mean, I'm not at my goal weight, hell, I ate Krispe Kream last night. I am not the girl who should be wearing running shorts.
Then, I kept running. For 2.25 miles in the rain. Covered in sweat and rain I kept thinking how I may not be the girl who should be wearing short running shorts (yet) and maybe people who see me are laughing. But I didn't see anyone else running and if they weren't running, I was lapping them.
I am the girl who runs when I'd rather relax.
I am the girl that relaxes by running.
I am the girl who panicked at the thought of running for 8 minutes straight during C25K and now think that a 20 minute run is a short run.
I am the girl who has lost 40 pounds beyond my pregnancy weight.
I am the girl who thought I couldn't do it.
I am reborn.
I am better.
I am strong.
I am not only a runner, but also a (mostly) healthy runner.
So forget the Krispie Kreams.
Forget the guilt.
Forget the never feeling good enough.
Forget the past.
Begin today and look forward.
You can do it.
With special thanks to my blogging inspirations: Mama Laughlin and Skinny Meg.
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